Be careful mentioning skirt steaks to him, though, he might grab it by the rib eye.

He prefers to skirt the issue. A real round about way to chuck an idea into the brisket.

since he cant sell burgers at his restaurant and can’t sell his steaks at sharper image, he has to take his beef to twitter.

I suggest rethinking that whole “Over 38" thing, guys.

I’m right there with you. I left the polls proud that I had voted for America’s first woman president. I was certainly wrong about that.

I don’t apologize for supporting my candidate, or for the reasons I supported her. But, I missed everything people were saying about why she couldn’t win. We can’t fix shit until we admit we screwed up.

Who would ever want to live in San Diego if there’s no perennial 8-8 NFL team there? It’s like hell on earth.

To pen an authentic and intellectual cinema review – the kind worthy of publication in America’s snootiest airport magazine – one must remember to include countless, such as it were, asides and clauses, seemingly without a purpose other than rendering one’s prose an inarticulate gruel of half thoughts, all while…

Energy = Oil!

I’m a simple guy, I don’t ask for much. I tend to vote for people who can string at least 3 coherent sentences together in a row. I’m going to miss this man a lot.

I guess Trump must be starting his interviews for the new head of FEMA.

Kanye West doesn’t care about black people

You’re just realizing this now? Most of my friends died in a fireball nearly 65 million years ago. Those that survived turned from terrible awe inspiring beasts as big as buildings into robins and sparrows. There clearly is no god.

When I was a younger man, I lived in Charlotte. On occasion I’d do as some 23 year olds do and go to a gentleman’s club. One particular establishment was called the Diamond Club. On the evening in question, my friends and I were enjoying our time there and lo and behold, we find out from the dancers that Jon Bon…

I was alone in an elevator with Ruth Bader Ginsburg and she farted. I was going to ignore it like a gentleman when she said “woah did somebody step on a duck.” We both laughed and she turned to me and said “no one will ever believe you if you tell this again.” She is one wise lady.

My wife and I were in VA Beach for a wedding. At the time she was 7 mos preggo. There was a golf tournament in town and some of the tour people were staying at our hotel. Long story short; We were entering the hotel and Earl Woods was in front of us. He let the heavy door slam in my wife’s face. He knew she was…

I really hope the Mets don’t waste a camp invite on someone who has proven he can’t play baseball at the Major League level. I get that he’s a really nice guy and used to be a famous star, but this whole David Wright spectacle needs to come to an end.

Whoa, guys, the Trumpocalypse will be >25% complete by the time we’re watching Westworld again. There’ll already be idiots talking about running in 2020... Can you imagine?

That’s our loop, sure as anything else.