“Artist’s rendering of White House transition of power. Image via Kensington Palace/The British Monarchy.”

Have the black person play the black person? Think bigger, darling.

FUCK THOSE BABIES THE BATHWATER WAS DISGUSTING!

Steve Bannon looks like every description of Wilbur Whately from HP Lovecrafts “The Dunwich Horror.”

Democrats can’t allow Trump to fill a Supreme Court vacancy during the last year of his presidency.

So the town took a philosophical question personally, buried its guilt deep beneath a giant mound of self-righteous indignation, then clutched its pearls and claimed that the real problem is people asking this question.

I’ve never called an elected representative in my life. I just did. I expected to have to leave a voicemail, but someone picked up on the first ring! This caught me off guard, so I stammered my way through what I wanted to say about the last couple of weeks, especially this weekend. Who knows if the congressperson I…

You have a higher chance of death from falling out of your bed than you do of being killed by an immigrant. 

the space military, duh

Maybe its just because I am a curmudgeonly old bibliophile, but I do not trust people who openly profess that they don’t read books.

This is absolutely mind-boggling to me. Normal adults often don’t even have time for a few minutes of television daily and THIS IS OUR PRESIDENT (?!). I will also just never get over the fact that the man who holds the most important office in the world tweets infantile word detritus to the tune of 140 characters…

Jew, reporting in! Guess who has two thumbs, a futon, and endless empathy for a refugee narrative? *this mensch*

“Zenhotta.”

Goddammit why can’t Deadspin just stick to spor

It seems hypocritical to keep referring to it as an egg and not a chicken.

“Economic terrorism” is not people putting their bodies on the line to protect their planet and/or their civil rights. Economic terrorism is financial de-regulation, it is white families owning sixteen times more wealth on average than black families, it is privatization of public resources, it is eight individuals…

What I like about this post is that you’re successfully re-establishing your brand as one of the best Deadspin commenters to a whole new demographic of workshy masturbators.

“to help launch our brand into the market...”

Hell yeah Poison Ivy