Well, of course he's going to have tinnitus, he's got a goddamn vortex in his head.

"No memory of Paul Brown? Great! Let's get you into a nice season ticket package."

Uh, Tim, I don't usually like pointing out Deadspin authors' stupidity here, but it's pretty clear the cut man is actually Perez.

be sure to check out the sequel: "The Window-Washer" starring John Daly

"Alexis has a testicle like this."

That is fine. All I am saying is Albert Burneko's tongue is dead and useless like Joan Collins's botox technician.

Note to everyone who says "but what if your pizza is too hot to hold?":

I haven't even read this... BUT I have to tell a cautionary tale.

My wife, "TheOtherDeviledEgg" is having some serious dental work done. As part of this work, she has to wear a flipper. Wearing this flipper prevents her from being able to take a bite out of anything. Every single item she eats must bypass her front…

Can you elaborate on the "disappearing minority who seem to realize that football is a sport?"

As a Chiefs' fan, should I throw things at my tv when Scott Pioli tries to take credit for the teams success this year because he hadn't be fired yet so he was allowed to come along when the team interviewed Andy Reid?

Mr. Babb: is there any real hope at Redskins Park that Snyder will "change" his leadership style and divest more of the authority for football operations to Allen, or is this a kind of "abandon hope all ye who enter here" situation? I think many of us believed this happened when Allen and Shanahan were hired, but the…

how hard is it for these guys to admit that they can't be the best at every job? we see guys go from lower-level coaches, to successful coordinators, to awful head coaches, and back down to coordinators. how do they handle the failure, considering the ego that each one of these lunatics possess?

I'm a Redskins fan. How real is the dysfunction in the locker room?

Kent,

Which franchise is more likely to be disfunctional: one with a super micro-managing owner or one with a very aloof owner?