If this is your honest, educated opinion maybe teaching isn't for you.

This is like the only post ever where this would be an appropriate comment.

The problem is that the expectations are unreasonable, which is where this system can collapse. If your requirements are "file these documents and book these meetings," that's different from "invent cold fusion and resurrect my cat."

Why do you think no one cares about that? And why do you think it's a competition? WTF?

"RAPE: The Crisis in Modern Society"

This makes me want to try it more now.

Vinegar pie is a break-up pie. It's a way to say "Happy birthday! I never loved you" with food.

♫ I came in like a wrecking ball ♫

I really don't think I've ever seen a commenter miss the point of a post as hard as you just did.

WAT. WAT. WAT. WAT.

I work taking care people who have regular toileting accidents, so every BM I don't have to clean off the floor is the best BM of my life.

Asshole here... well... "arsehole", actually. It's not bread because it's not a bread dough — it's a sponge cake batter, and that's why it's a pudding.

Marriages to former drug-dealing rappers or finger tattoos?

Funny, I waited tables for years and saw plenty of women treating their partners. I guess none of those women want to date you, though.

Female friendly for me would be a whiskey bar with a staff that looks like Tom Selleck.

I hate the word pussy - not in a cringy way, but if my partner says the word pussy when we are getting sexy, it's a hue turnoff because I feel like I am being taken out of our intimate situation and put in a standard nonsense porn.

Just tell her you don't want to buy the pig. You only want a little sausage.

You laugh now, but then Facebook will go ahead and buy it for dicktillion dollars. And then the brogrammers who brogrammed it will invest all of their money in axe body spray.