Counter-conjecture: A Peel Trident, with a 1.07M width and a height of ~1.1M at the highest point, fortuitously curved in such a way that it corresponds well to a moose, will pass the moose test in this manner with near certainty. A proper testing scenario will involve this test as a benchmark and include other…

???

I'm pretty sure that's not the Red October. One thing has an odd bulbous shape, a slightly quirky drivetrain, and is in some small way emblematic of a nation. The other thing is a submarine.

...THEN YOU FOLLOW UP ON THE TIP, RIGHT?

I SEE WHAT YOU'RE SAYING, YOU SHOULD GET AS DEEPLY INVOLVED IN THINGS AS YOU CAN. PROVIDES THE BEST FIT FOR THE SITUATION.

I'M USUALLY MORE CAREFUL ABOUT INSERTING MYSELF INTO THESE THINGS ANYWAY

AGAIN YOU YANK THE CONVERSATION TOWARD YOU, WHY

AT LEAST NEITHER OF US IS A WHOLE FINGER SHORT

I KNOW MAN I JUST COULDN'T COME UP WITH A GOOD PUN. I THOUGHT LONG AND HARD.

I think the guy lost his grip a long time before eating his own finger. Just a hunch.

Torch, stop wearing Hardibro's skin and pretending to be him. It doesn't suit you.

Two cars diverged in an import lot

Taigun, Taigun, driving light

Good point, I didn't even think about it being a powder coat. Aluminum alloys do get quite tetchy with heat.

Actually, considering that to get paint to stick to aluminum, one basically has to treat it with acidic alien blood first (or rather, an etching primer), it's not crazy. It's not impossible for an etching primer (since it "roughs up" the surface) to create a point defect in the surface that leads to a crack. Still…

It's making me a suit for my car, now?

I like this one. (Are Friends Electric?)

Here's the most piratey and approving picture of Alec Issigonis I could find. Enjoy.

You missed your calling, I suspect.

Realistic killjoy answer: divide bridges for different parts of the route.