This is a case where the parents are being abusive by putting the baby through completely pointless pain and suffering. At that point, it makes sense for government to step in and protect the child from his parents. Now, the parents believe this further pain and suffering has a chance to improve his condition, but…

I bet you can name three people who wouldn’t go on a killing spree if you hit them with a baseball bat. I bet you could also name a person who has gone on a killing spree without being hit by a baseball bat. I’m glad you’ve had great rescue dogs, but why you think dogs are a monolith is beyond me.

She also is interested in math and science (was a correspondent on Bill Nye Saves the World) and supports a program/scholarship that teaches young girls computer coding. So I respect her more than a lot of models.

Right, Asians are so respected that Chris Rock can parade three Asian kids onto the stage at the Oscars as the butt of a joke. Isn’t it adorable how all Asians are child-worker math nerds?

That was surprisingly hilarious.

Hawaii has challenged the “close family” guidelines in the new ban. That’s right, White House, you may think you got away with it at the end of the day and now everyone’s going to bed, but over here we’ve got plenty of day left.

Huh? Shannen Doherty’s eyes are asymmetrical, but they point in the same direction. Not so with Huckabee Sanders. I have a close family friend with the same slightly side-looking eye, though, so I wouldn’t fault anyone for that. All I can say is that Huckabee Sanders looks too much like her father, and he is a monster.

I was similar in that my younger brother got into it first—he was the one who received the first book as a gift from someone in the know. Then in the summer of 1999 I discovered them, devouring the first three books in three consecutive days (our cousin in the U.K. had given us the 3rd book before it was out in the…

I have this vague recollection that she was in a biopic of someone. And she called Pittsburgh “Shitsburgh.”

I was going to jump in and tell you the thing that I remember her for but then realized I forgot what it was.

It’s mainly just a lack of clarity. Westworld is a TV show. There is also a movie called Westworld, but to be fair, these days when someone says, “Have you seen Westworld?” you can be pretty sure they’re talking about the TV show. Lisa Joy is one of the two creators of the TV show Westworld. The headline would be…

The Halloween and anti-American/anti-family cake thing is completely irrelevant, too, and it pisses me off when people throw those things in there as if it’s any defense at all. They won’t make a Halloween cake for anyone. There’s no discrimination, because it’s simply not a service they offer. That’s fine.

Well that makes sense as long as photographers can also refuse to do a Jewish wedding or a black wedding because of the people’s religion or race.

Wow, you can really see the Donald in her in that pre-surgery photo. Takes a lot of work to try to cover it up, but she can’t escape it entirely.

OK, but I still would have done almost anything to get an invite to Sean Parker’s Lord of the Rings wedding. Are costume weddings acceptable if you provide tailored costumes for all the guests?

“No, most likely the primary control knob is the ocean waters and this environment that we live in.”

Disgusting. Are they still boasting about bringing him home now that he’s passed after not regaining consciousness? What kind of strings did Trump have to pull to get back a comatose kid who would never wake up again? I’m sure it was invaluable in giving the family closure, but it hardly seems like an astounding…

Same with Ivanka. I hope their kids can find better mouth role models than their parents and avoid winding up with weird mouth shapes when they talk.

Wizarding World of Harry Potter at Universal Studios wins out over Disney World for me right now. But once the Star Wars park opens at Disney, I will be there in no time!

When I saw this trailer in theaters, I thought three things, in this order: 1) Poor sharks, this is not going to help their undeserved reputation. 2) I cannot see this movie, because it will make me afraid of diving—not because of the sharks, but because if you suddenly sank to 47 m, the sharks would be the least of…