That's because it's been on so long you can tie pretty much everything to it!

Children's entertainment is fucking bleak.

Can I borrow that grand?

I'm single AND unemployed. Am I a pitiable sadsack?

Vodka with a splash of cranberry juice. Very festive and a little sumpin-sumpin for the kidneys.

Or you have taste in films and despise the "adulthood sucks" propaganda that Pixar loads all of their movies with.

Ugh, I really AM going to fight with my sister, too. She spent her wedding dinner pointing at her wedding band and sticking her tongue out at me.

And she's the older sister.

I'm single, unemployed, and still grieving over an ended relationship against my conscious will. I know this is just a temporary valley, but the guilt trip I got for spending money on presents for Black Friday on top of the fact that oops, my family forgot to mention we aren't exchanging gifts this year, has sapped me…

The saffron thing works because after buying all that saffron to chew on, you are too poor to buy any other food.

A male friend actually lost 100 lbs playing dance, dance revolution and I lost about 25 doing wii stuff, so video games can help. But I don't see why knitting or crosswords wouldn't be just as effective by his theory. You could also constantly paint your nails..wait until dry, take off and repeat until you're a…

I thought THIS was TV's biggest charlatan! Monorail, monorail, monorail!

As someone who has had some pretty awful interactions with medical practitioners, including semi-invasive procedures that required sedation despite the fact that my symptoms didn't totally fit (yes, this is after the second opinion) who aren't on TV, I'm going to say straight up that Dr. Oz isn't that bad.

Oprah had a doctor on who said hypothyroidism is caused by "swallowing your words" (in case you didn't know, it's usually autoimmune). She also spent a couple years promoting The Secret which was essentially "if you think good thoughts, you'll get rich and be healthy and all the good things will happen, because I…

"blerp blerp you just haven't had good fruitcake blerp blerp i will come to your house and make you eat my fruitcake which is good fruitcake and then i will not leave/untie you from the chair until you admit that it is good fruitcake blerp blerp"

Best.

I have to really step in here to speak up for people who have mental health issues. I am an attorney who has worked with people with all kinds of cognitive disabilities, brain injuries, and mental illnesses, and while your concern is understandable, I think it is leading you to make arguments that are against the…

I'm saying they cope with being abandoned a lot better than they cope with being murdered.

STOP WATCHING MY FAMILY AND ACCURATELY DESCRIBING US ON THE INTERNET!!!

Honestly, if I had 6 children I might be tempted to run away to Australia too. Especially if they had lice, and too much home work, and runny noses and they left legos all over the floor, and I tripod and banged my leg on one of their bikes, and they put gum in my hair and they kept singing Katy Perry songs even…