so like, now i gotta add " don't fuck your' bike, Butters " to my list of daily don'ts ????

For afternoon coffee?

THAT'S WHAT I YELLED AS SOON AS I GOT TO THE PART OF THE NEWS STORY THAT SAID IT WAS SLENDER MAN!!! Hearing news reporters saying the words "creepypasta," "Slender Man," and Something Awful with that serious of a tone is RIDICULOUS!!!

Ia! Ia! Shub-Niggurath! The Goat of the Woods with a Thousand Young!

I dunno, have you ever spent time in the 'burbs? The despondency and ennui are almost tailor-made for a creature who is "the source of constant anxiety for mankind at a subconscious level..."

Leave the good sea lord out of this.

About a dozen Patriot Guard members were at my great-uncle's burial service this weekend. Not that anyone expected any trouble at a small town service for an 89 year old WWII vet, but I made sure to thank each of them. Their response, "It's our honor, sir."

Can we get bacon double cheeseburgers in the mix somehow?

Erin, I love your stuff, but I have to respectfully disagree re: "bare minimum standard of human decency."

Timeless activist funeral? Check
Westboro Baptist Crazies? Check.
Motorcycle gang fighting for freedom and justice? Check.

Or, you know, just ditched the ugly bouquet and just carried the little bastard.

It would've been better if she had taken a page out of the crazy British hat book and attached the infant to her head instead. Then she'd be VOLTRONBRIDE, DEFENDER OF THE RECEPTIONVERSE.

There is no Wadaisy

Are you polling everyone? Because I'm not wearing underwear right now. So far, yes, you are the only person still wearing underwear.

Re: Pippa

You don't get to decide how people mourn for their pets just like I don't get to decide how you feel about anything. I have seen lonely people find absolute joy in their pets when people have kicked them to curb and they absolutely mourn for them like it was a family member. There is enough love for everyone and…

oh god seriously. the cat box smells. you don't notice it, but it smells. >_<

Well, to be fair, baby-owners can be pretty annoying too. I would personally rather sit near a dog at a restaurant than a baby; dogs are usually quieter.

I don't feel guilty. I fucking hate kids, hate them so much. If I saw a bus coming and there was a kid and a dog in the way and I could only save one, I'd save the dog. Kids suck.