Hmm. I was really disappointed that he wasn't going to take advantage of making a "frat fashionista" pun, but he did at the end. You didn't like that? I, for one, loved it! Bad puns are one of my favorite things.

I find this one sort of cute. The humor is gentle, the tone is whimsical, and there's a marked lack of either rape references or threats of cunt punting.

Approves.

I love dog-logic.

My in-laws' malamute once stole a grapefruit, and lodged it so firmly in his jaws that he couldn't drop it. He clearly hated the taste, but every time they tried to take it from him, he would bite down harder and squirt more grapefruit into his mouth.

Is it everything you imagined, Owen?

Well, for starters, the headline would be "No, The Xbox One Doesn't Have A 'Wobbling' Problem."

I bet if you reverse that .gif it looks like the PS4 prints post-it notes.

Peon consoles. Know your place.

... that makes me like him even more...

I used to work on Broadway shows, once upon a time. The building where we had our office also housed the offices for several theatres and a few rehearsal spaces. I have a million celebrity elevator stories.

Once I got on and found myself standing next to Robert Sean Leonard. The elevator was packed. It stopped its…

50 shades of what?

Every time Dakota Johnson is mentioned, my brain automatically fills in Dakota Fanning, and it gets confusing, albeit amusing to imagine DF in 50 Shades.

For some reason I didn't know that bit of trivia about Branagh/Thompson/HBC, and having watched all the Harry Potter movies again over the three-day weekend makes it even more scandalous. Gilderoy Lockhart was married to Sibyll Trelawney but had an affair with Bellatrix Lestrange? BIG MAGICAL WHAT.

This seems like an opportune time to post gif's of Nicolas Cage as Disney princesses.

I once found myself on an elevator with Kenneth Branagh. Being inebriated, I did what I felt any sensible person should do under those circumstances: I complimented him on his body of work and asked if he would give me HBC's phone number. He stopped ignoring me long enough to look up and chuckle, "You can't actually…

As with most things, I blame space cats. In this particular case, I'd take a look at this one.

is this the Borealis ?!!