“Had a great night. Make 2ure you get your 2hoes from my bathroom.”

Clearly you’ve never been with a Vassar chick.

Off of a glove, sure, I get that. Who among us can resist an attractive pair of Mechanix?

Monica Seles

Yeah, Dimebag Darrell thought he was just being greeted by a fan.

If Noah doesn’t want to support an organization that ruins young men’s lives then he shouldn’t have signed with the Knicks.

Tom Brady [sniffs his ass]

Unsolicited Extra Fingers in the Ass?

To me they actually just look like the standard humps to conceal the hinges for the hatch, and they’ve just been given the ricer add-on treatment to keep with overall more-is-more theme

That fellow up there in the blue is Irish welterweight Steven Donnelly, after his round-of-16 win at the Rio Olympics. Looks happy, doesn’t he?

Curt hasn’t been this invested in a trainwreck since 38 Studios.

I’m so sick and tired of you liberals endangering my children with allowing sexual deviants and predators into their bathrooms.

Good work, you repeated the joke.... but in a less funny way

Sadly, he had no idea what to do when he reached third base

Funny, Adrian Peterson’s son’s face is imprinted on his cleats too.

I can see both sides of it. Yes, even after the quick KO, Aldo has a claim to another shot. At the same time, when the UFC has a dearth of marketable, bankable stars, like it or not, the personality-less former champ who never drew flies to shit and lost in humiliating fashion isn’t gonna be the guy who’s at the top…

Mmmmmm....scrapple....Gotta love that scary breakfast dish, but corned beef hash is a great second! And I always wonder why the waitress/waiter asks me if I want home fries with my hash...total overkill

My grandmother doesn’t (didn’t? I think she still has it) one that goes by touch, but it has both a regular black knob, but then, since it’s a floor lamp, you can just pull the main post down to click it on/off as well. It is (or was) parked right next to my late grandfather’s recliner.

So if you complete a marathon at 8:30 mile pace, you jogged a marathon? Because that sounds stupid.

Tebow+Talent=Philip Rivers.