Seems like he was in denial.

I don’t get it. Touching hands is a lot less physical contact than getting your ass handed to you.

Maybe you shouldn’t check the regular news if you don’t want to see current regular news.

Well, yeah, when they can actually tell two swimmers apart.

With the lone hilarious mistake (Lochte/Phelps). ;)

This one shows the immediate aftermath.

I guess Americans all look the same, is that right, you racist Canadians?

Jason Torchinsky needs to chime in on this. He probably has a useful graphic to show how the angles work in real life.

Moes > Chipotle because, well...Queso.

The Rich Gannon Raiders honestly feel as far back in the past as the Industrial Revolution. They were a Tuck Rule away from going to the Super Bowl; how is that possible?

Listen, I’m just glad you overcame your stroke and can use a keyboard again. I’m sure your tastebuds will come back eventually.

The arm injury surely stung like hell, but he should be grateful that he’s not from Penisbaijan.

“The single worst thing that has ever happened to an Armenian”

Jesus fucking Christ. I think I heard my elbow actually scream watching that. God damn.

I bet that bar was made in Turkey.

Everything I know about Armenia, I learned from my freshman year college roommate and his friends. I assume Karapetyan’s body broke down after going more than five minutes without a cigarette.

“Ladies enjoying themselves? This looks like a job for... my dick!”

Oh please. Everyone knows cosplayers bang each other in costume.

Otherwise there would be no point. Right?

:p

Seriously. That was the least titillating tit I have ever seen. Meanwhile, let’s all shake our heads at the puritanical reaction to Janet Jackson’s nip coming out in the superbowl, but if a tiny part of a boob pops out in a water polo scrum its too much for us.