John Fox: I guess there's no easy way to say this, but I think it's time we go our separate ways. It's been a great partnership, and I'll always be grateful for everything you've given me over the years, but I just feel like I'll be able to extend my career with another option. The last year or so has been bumpy, and…

Her monogrammed coffee thermos says "Bad Motherfucker" on it.

She once won with a semi-automatic pistol.

In her spare time, the chef from David's story enjoys Russian Roulette, eating glass, and arm-wrestling silverback gorillas during their mating season.

God damn, +1

If you really want to get the Gawker staff some marital aids, do what Chris Kluwe did and piss off Gamergate.

That was a joke. Relax, buddy.

Why was it a crime scene? The cops already know who shot the kid.

Depends... are the Low Points minorities?

New-ish Virginia resident here. I can't believe moving north from Carolina DROPPED the letter grade 2 full points. Thanks, Governor McFelony.

They actually cut off the column after one letter... the full grade for the US is "Can you people do anything right for just one goddamn year? Seriously. Oh, yeah, awesome, John Boehner again. Are you people insane?"

Hopefully the latter, if only because I would love to see that in bronze.

This is bad kinja

He wanted to do just enough to get the man to stop fighting so that he could be subdued by security.

They're about 10 years, one tax bracket, and three guns away from being a Texas Libertarian.

I am a bit late to the party, but THANK YOU FOR THIS. Totally interrupting my cookie rotation next week for this bad boy.

That sounds absolutely terrifying.

Depends on the contract, but typically yeah. They'll have a base "guaranteed" salary that they get paid regardless of if they play, so long as they're on the roster that season, plus incentives for hitting certain milestones (yards gained, games played in, making the playoffs, etc). Sometimes players can be cut…

Oh man, I want the Freaks and Geeks one right now. I bet you can still taste that one hours after you finish eating it. LOVE me some vinegary pizza toppings.

Bing cherries on a pizza is something I've literally never heard of before but dear sweet jesus that sounds fantastic.