I really hope she doesn't get off on playing with rolls.

Keep it classy, religious zealots. Fuck off.

Chipper's acting like he's a master of puppets or something.

I already saw this scene play out with Gianna Michaels a few years ago. Next.

I bet a Timbers fan did it.

She really should have known that Jerry Rice would catch her.

Admirable goal, since most guys would rather learn how to be hung.

More proof that it's not your cat plotting your demise...it's your kids.

Not just a good thing, but a GREAT thing.

I'm just saying she probably fucks like a dinosaur. That's all.

Panning goes side to side. You be you, cinematically-challenged internet tough guy.

Not just the dress, if you know what I'm sayin'...

Fuck consumerism.

So dudes tend to be full of shit? Unheard of. UNHEARD OF.

I would like to thank Bill Cosby and Phylicia Rashad for almost entirely killing off my childhood. I only need to learn of Wilford Brimley being involved in a meth ring for the deed to be complete.

I'd be pretty mad, too, if my name were Kirby. Think about that—Kirby. Fucking hell.

I'm enjoying this Merlot too much to care to respond in depth. Have a nice night!

Right? How dare her for living life on her terms instead of looking to satisfy keyboard (and/or MRA) warriors.

I mean, if the people were cunty, then fuck them.

Her voice kind of turns me on. I said it. Get at me.