Q: What do Sally Hemings and the children of Lebanon Middle School have in common?

@Karlifornia: As opposed to their father, who spends his nights seeding the Union.

@UweBollocks: Allow me to address your point with a counterpoint, in which I also overuse the word point.

But that's not what the media does, because reporting that "Ben Roethlisberger is a dick" is not "newsworthy." If that's an argument, then there's no justification for saying it becomes newsworthy now, in the wake of his very public embarrassment.

@skeleton69: That's not true. He isn't humble.

I think a major difference with lacrosse (and this is probably how you define "assholery" at any rate) is how white and homogenous the sport is

@J.L. White: You're arguing something entirely different. If the reporter didn't have a solid source regarding the "my dad was a pimp" exchange, he shouldn't have reported it. If he did have a credible source, it's relevant info shedding further light on an issue that has been reported on extensively.

@Thats_Juan_Lucky_Pierre: I think the Dolphins realized is that the best response is to simply apologize and let it blow over. Any attempt to rationalize / excuse his question would just lead to further dissection of his purported rationale. The "just shut up and move on" strategy is probably the best one here.

@Thats_Juan_Lucky_Pierre: Except why would he admit to it being a premeditated question if that wasn't the case? That's like defending an accidental manslaughter charge by arguing that you had a really good reason to kill the guy.

@Chris Hanson's Axe: Context, schmontext! Everything is black and white! Just ask any of the fine columnists who write for the sports section of the NY Post!

The "ludicrous exegesis" (great word!) of the question's context that Tommy cites is the following purported exchange:

@intrepid spaniel Stigg: You know, just when you think that no one notices your lame, non-star-worthy attempts at humor . . .

I am so proud right now.

They must have edited out the offensive names, or Cleveland Steamers would have been very high on the list.

/ Hangs head in shame at having previously used entries 3, 57 and 182 on the CBS list.

@tastes_like_burning: In fairness, kids usually don't realize they want to go the other way until they hit puberty.

@shmendo: No! No, no, not six! Seven! It's like you're dreamin' about Gorgonzola cheese when it's clearly Brie time, baby.

Jeff Ireland is just using the "Deep Cover" interview method.

So let's get Dick Ebersol's priorities straight:

@Doug Dascenzo's Only Fan: What about former Arizona State cheerleaders?