I may get some shit for this opinion...but I think Eli was very underrated as an SNL host.

He doesn’t even fucking know.

Yeah, you know, it really works. Trump is five INTs-in-a-half bad at presidenting, while Clinton would’ve given us 200 yards, 1 TD, and no picks in presiding over an unexciting but marginally effective bureaucracy that wins games 16-10.

This one works the best.

I believe that people underestimate how bad the more distant past really was and how shitty it would be to rewind an era or two. I think every one of our nation’s first 150 to 175 years, and most of the ones since, were indisputably worse than this (still undeniable shitshow of a) year.

It’s a floor cleaner AND a dessert topping.

Fixed! Thanks, Ernie from Kinja.

Not sure if related, but my little ‘update bar’ (or whatever one calls it when you click on your notification badge at the top right) hasn’t worked right since getting the follow/ungrey from you. The notification number is there, but the details won’t load.

This case is getting weird. I’m wondering, will it go around in circles?

I would like to be ungreyed so as to hold down the right and true “ketchup is perfectly damn fine to put on a hot dog” side of the argument when it inevitably arises.

The part of Twitter where black people hang out, and better.

I live within two miles of two pizza joints consistently rated in the top 50-100 nationally. I eat both all the time.

“I’m sure THIS TIME we’ve figured out the exact right attitudes to hold for the rest of eternity and don’t need to change anything.”

280 characters = twice the opportunity to show your ass.

I say “doggie.”

I think what’s holding up resolution there is the fact that by and large Roller Derby names are fucking AWESOME.

Jared Sullinger! Brandon Bass! Von Wafer!!!

Tuesday is film review, weights, light pads, and game plan installation. No time for a true Football Guy to vote.

Kinda Deals are family deals. Happy families. Maybe single people are interested in Kinja Deals, we don’t know. And frankly, we don’t want to know.

‘Nonplussed’ is one of those fantastic words with two completely opposite meanings.