The first two are tragedies, but the third is a mitzvah. BOB needs to fuck off back to underneath Belichick’s skirt.

Ugh. The only stat that matters with regard to Trout’s MVP bona fides is games played. You cannot give the MVP award to someone who only plays 75% of the season. It sucks that Trout was hurt, but them’s the breaks.

Fun fact: Rob Thomas (the TV showrunner, not the Matchbox 20 guy) taught at the University of Texas and a character on iZombie is named after Major Applewhite. See if you can guess which one!

Since guns don’t kill people, people kill people, the only solution is to ban men.

Can my employer then terminate my employment if I don’t ‘cooperate’ with them writing a report that will be publicly available and thus potentially lead to my arrest?

Joey Gallo is having a great time, folks!

The Rangers would have still ended the season with a home series, and their concern about the wild card race is laughable considering they traded half the team a few weeks ago. Meanwhile, the Astros are now on a 19 game road trip regardless of where this series is played, halfway across the country from their stranded…

Am I missing the joke or are you too young to remember Rae Carruth?

Right, because Game 6 was a function of D’Antoni and Harden finally remembering that they can’t succeed in the post-season, and not Harden’s back giving out from carrying a mediocre team to the third best record in the league as one of the greatest offenses ever.

Ironic, because the business inflicted a fatal wound to Nancy and Daniel Benoit.

Car sex needs to be on that list. I still have a car-sex-related scar on my back from high school.

And I’m uncomfortable with the idea that an employer, government or otherwise, should be liable for their employees’ personal affairs. Making employers responsible for what adults do behind closed doors will eventually remove those doors. There are situations where that may be good, but many more where that’s a big…

Is there a city ordinance requiring all Boston sports teams to employ at least one broadcaster who sounds like the dad from Family Guy and is borderline racist?

You don’t think McCullers is a legit #2? He’s a little immature/emotional, which I think is part of the reason he sometimes struggles on the road, but the guy can SHOVE.

The Mets are a complete farce, but I’d also take anything Heyman reports with a huge grain of Boras-mouthpiece-flavored salt.

Holy shit.

Jesus Christ, after reading this I’m surprised to learn Russ’ press conference last night didn’t conclude with the heavens parting and trumpets accompanying him as he ascended skyward.

Houston’s bench was light-years better than OKC’s, but I find it interesting that for all the talk of Harden’s great supporting cast, most of his fellow starters were abysmal this series. I mean, Ryan Anderson played 30 minutes per game and shot 14% from three, and Ariza played nearly 40 minutes per game and averaged…

Watching the game as an Astros fan, it was stunning to me just how few fucks the A’s defense seemed to give that their pitcher had a no-hitter going.

TOO SOON.