The 2002 T-Bird looks like something by Mignola.

Shame. Not that I was the target demographic, but still.

To continue the theme of cars horribly uglified on import...

The R5 is a very good-looking car, but what they did to the grille and headlights on the Le Car is unforgivable.

That, or the Scorpio. Man, the US version of the Scorpio got ambushed, assaulted and battered with the ugly stick the moment it got off the boat.

For me it was having an Irish roommate. Ireland must be like the ancient Sparta of wit.

I imagine that according to this guy, sex is "a repetitive in-and-out motion", eating is "putting stuff in your mouth and chewing", etc. etc.

That doesn't make it right or okay

Actually, it looks a pinch like an Aston, to me, particularly around the headlights.

Microsoft invested $100 million to fuck up what was perfect.

When there's a smatter outbreak, things can get a bit target-rich...

What's wrong with Citroen?

More like Second Life meets Slenderman...

Agreed, the review reads like an unambiguous *NO*. Maybe release-window games are getting graded on a curve?

Yeah, this time around mine isn't going to be a two-console household either. Between the size, the power brick, the Metro tile nonsense, the voice controls and the fucking Eye of Sauron, the lack of power seems to be the least of the One's problems as far as I'm concerned.

For a high negative value of "landmark"...

There's no worse backseat designer than an actual designer.

Slow for sure, but I wouldn't call it ugly. It has aged rather well too.

I never got into it far enough to judge the gameplay in its own merits, but it has got the most uninspired, poorly-written and poorly developed universe I've come across in a space game. That's pretty off-putting to me right off the bat.

Indeed. Throw in some Apple hate too to get the neckbeards nice and frothy.