I get what you're saying, but to continue your analogy, your response to this piece was basically exactly what the vegans I know would've done... And you'll notice I didn't refer to them as "my vegan friends."

For people who have and will continue to use car washes (because in many, many cases, they are more…

And yet it is being covered by Deadspin during a time when his deposition video is THE "Justin Bieber video" on the Internet. Negative self-awareness? Or has the machine become almost... too self-aware?

"Please ignore all of this and take the time to learn how to hand wash your car properly."

Yeah, that definitely sounds like someone who had left all presumptions in his lightweight jacket at the coat check. His "tip" was condescending from the moment he stopped thinking and started typing. You jumped in and reacted…

I'm an adult. I don't fight children, the weak, or the infirm.

I was neutral to mildly rooting for the Chiefs (I feel like Andy Reid and Alex Smith get a lot of shit they don't really deserve), and it was just gut-wrenching watching that game. I can't even imagine what it would've been like for a fan of either team.

Try selling that "football is de-fanged" line to all the guys who weren't able to finish that Chiefs-Colts game. I think some of them are able to receive visitors now.

So, just to recap, you made a statement that was incomplete at best and incomplete and stupid at worst. I responded with one sentence that is an objective fact. You replied to that by expanding on your original (incomplete and possibly stupid) statement by adding points that you didn't mention the first time. But…

Get it out of your system. I'll wait.

Are you all done?

Fuck Nuggets: This is pretty simple. Really. It's really simple. You can't criticize someone because their original response to you didn't take into account information you included in your response to them. Not all of us are time-traveling wizards.

"And LA is at least a big market, so I can see that."

Yeah. That's totally "great history there and LA deserves a team."

If splitting hairs is "you say one thing, I say something different, and then you add to your original statement to cover what you missed the first time" then, yes. I'm splitting hairs. Or you…

So what are these indicators of a deserving fan base of which you speak? And is the presence of a deserving fan base the only criteria for whether or not a region should have a hockey club? You can probably make a lot of friends in Hartford by how you answer that second question, but you're probably gonna make a lot…

Yeah, but that's my point... You vouched for L.A. because it has a lot of people who can support a team. I vouched for L.A. because they have a good enough team to hoist the cup.

+1 Vermonter saying "Ours is the best!"

You know the L.A. Kings just won the Cup two seasons ago, right?

Namaste, Escape Velocity. Namaste.

This is effing ridiculous. He was in a platform where he could've said "This was really stupid... you guys know better... This should never have happened" and enforced the rules while also saying to everyone who was freaking out "Hey, calm down a little bit. If your children are genuinely traumatized by seeing one…

You've started an important thread here, and I don't want to let it Go Around the Bend without adding my Grievance. It seems that the NFL media has a bad Habit of making All or None proclamations on these things. We're not exactly Light Years away from an era were the league and the players have a Master/Slave…

I spazzed out, eh? Was I actin' all retarted too? Did I derp the herp?

I'm really trying to feel more compassion than pity for you. Sincerely. I'm trying.

Ladies and Gentlemen! A warm round of applause for Escape Velocity, the Human Tantrum!