I know. I usually buy VF about twice a year, so generally speaking, there would be a 17% chance of me reading this. Thanks to her tantrum, there's now a 100% chance. This is so theatrical that it almost makes me wonder if she and VF conspired to help sell more copies of the issue.

What I have learned from those movies is that it's important to die when the light falling across one's sunken face is at its most golden.

Ooh, my grocery store doesn't have those! I think that if I had a company that pre-packaged and sold such things, I would call them "watermelon fingers."

Do you think by "cuts," he means slices or chunks? I must know.

I know, I was pretty worried about Imaginary Girlfriend. Maybe she has the Magical Movie Disease, wherein her inevitable death will be made even more poignant by the fact that it strikes her right in the prime of her delicate beauty?

Get back to your office and turn that shit off!

Yeah, that other comment so trollish that it annoys me more than offends me—there's not even any effort put into it, just "what's the most dumb and appalling way to look at this situation?" Lazy trolling is the worst of all trolling.

I like how she's so into Halloween that she even got age makeup on her LEGS. That's commitment. I'm kind of indifferent to Heidi Klum in general and largely dislike Halloween, but her commitment to the holiday is really charming.

How much are partially-filled Hale & Hearty stamp cards worth? Because I imagine I have at least $700 worth of those knocking around my bag.

Is she maybe the one in the sheer-illusion lace cocktail dress? Because that was a cool choice for a funeral, even without the selfie.

Here is a complete list of people who have referred to these kids as "Satan Spawn" and "Literally Hitler" on this thread:

Well. I don't know if "we" do want children to be free to dress however makes them happy, actually. If I had a daughter who wanted to dress as Stalin and play gulag with her dolls, I would not be so cool with that, for example. And obviously the princess shit is not that extreme, but as others on this thread have…

Oh, yes, in conversation it's the worst. And they're never subtle about it.

But if we're talking about how people respond to photos, what does this really establish? If it's happening in conversation, then yes, that sucks—because it means that people aren't really "listening" to us, in the sense that "listening" includes not only absorbing auditory info, but also paying attention to facial…

I was just invited to one of these for someone who had already been married once, with small children. And in my mean private head I just thought I cannot pony up this cash all over again with you. You are not a bachelorette! You are a divorcée!

I'm willing to give you the benefit of the doubt, but I will not test this personally.

I'm not actually convinced that you're saving a lot of water with the bath method. Though obviously for a dish-shower to be economical about water, it's better not to leave the water running the whole time. Turn it off and on as needed.

High-five for the dish shower!

Exactly. Plus: he's nineteen. How many of us were paragons of frugality at 19? When I was that age, I had my first credit card, and $320 represented 64% of its entire buying power. And did I make similarly frivolous purchases? You bet I did.

INDEED. If you believe that $320 is too much for a belt, THEN LOOK TO THE PERSON SELLING $320 BELTS.