Think about all the INFURIATING red tape we go through ALL THE DAMN TIME to prevent this and how difficult it is for us to get our basic jobs done in order to protect patient privacy and then these people go and do this.

You're such a man. You scoot your ass in the bathtub until your clit is situated underneath the faucet and then turn the water on, until you have an orgasm. That's what you do when you don't have a handheld shower head.

Goddammit. I LOVED their first album. LOVED. It stayed with me all through middle school and high school. And of course I had a huge crush on this dude and his oh-so-deep lyrics. Not gonna lie, I could definitely still listen to that album (in private) and love it, so it makes me kind of sad to admit this but: you…

way to generalize.

Still a better love story than Twilight.

The first one didn't make you want to do that?

I'm sincerely glad I'm not the only one

When I'm asked if I've found Jesus, I reply, "What? Have you lost him AGAIN?"

These are so common that there'd be no point in recounting a story of them. Every server I know has had this happen at least once.

Now I want to watch the Veronica Mars movie again.

It was delicious if you like homophobia.

I like how we're all ignoring that she called him a "queen" just because we don't like him.

I guess we all forgot how Rihanna cyber bullied her fan the other day...

Torrei has been going on major media outlets rehashing her split from Kevin Hart and the fact that he cheated and is with another woman now. Yes, cheating is bad, but she's obviously creating a storm to promote her show. He responded on twitter, didn't say anything out of line or offensive and Jezebel is criticizing…

Someone once wrote on yelp that I was off-putting because I walked too quietly.

I got in trouble for walking passed someone's table too loudly at my old restaurant job. The customer complained about it in an online review.

Here's my problem: a "life-sized" baked potato is actually regular potato size. She meant a giant potato. Admittedly, this is a small (potato sized) problem.

This will haunt my dreams now. Thanks a lot.

Really Sketchy Ecstasy would make a fabulous band name.