To be fair, I often feel like I'm going to die in the security line at Dulles when I haven't had a drink in days.

This is probably the least-offensive sorority letter I've ever seen.

A few years ago my office almost moved from ~30 minutes away from me to ~2 hours away from me. I gave them a heads up that if the office did move that far away I would have to quit and they really did not understand why.

It gives me joy

Are you in the U.S.? I don't think the U.S. even has the option to pick up in person.

Several years ago I saw a 4-year-old play ukelele and sing "You've Got a Friend in Me" from Toy Story in a Hawaiian music concert and I still haven't stopped Squee-ing.

My library sells deaccessioned books for 10 cents or 25 cents. It's great!

That's still my favorite sketch.

I got my passport renewed in October and it took TWELVE CALENDAR DAYS. Including shipping. When I got it in the mail I thought for sure that it was getting rejected for some reason. It was so fast!

I work for a different federal department, and Jezebel is not blocked. The only Gawker site blocked is Kotaku, as far as I can tell.

Maybe we just think we are full-spectral

While adopting pets from animal shelters is not actually free, I still like that it is on this list because it is vastly less expensive, and better for the pets, and better for the community, etc. etc. etc.

The Crimean War has started again, and there's a black market for cheese. I'm starting to get simultaneously scared and super duper excited. I might have to move my Thursday Next books from "fiction" to "non-fiction"

Nobody cares about your boner.

*she

http://nationalzoo.si.edu/animals/webcam…

My cat loves potato chips. Really, really loves them.

I'm not sure if Ariana Grande really needs Blake Lively's help being preserved. She's already been a baby for like 20 years.

I frequently travel to cold places in the dead of winter. (Don't ask.) These are some things that I've learned, both good and bad:

i.e. How to make sure you are getting raped by a genuine Uber Rapist (TM) and not some kind of creepy knock-off rapist.