Last week my mom expected me to sit next to my brother on a couch and I was like "no thanks I think I'll sit on the floor"

He was the best grandpa.....

They should do a cold open where she plays every single Parks & Rec character for 5 seconds each.

.... to a Parks & Rec marathon.

"Knickers stickers" it is! I'll spread the word.

I don't mind "panty liner" because at least it is descriptive (if you don't mind the word "panty") but really?? It's not a napkin, and it's not sanitary.

I do this with my shower caddy. I clear off one of the shelves whenever I have a guest over, because I personally hate not having anywhere to put my toiletries when I'm staying at someone's house, or having to carry wet toiletries back to the bedroom and put them back in my suitcase.

My brother gives ONLY gag gifts. But he's a teenager so I let it go. (JK I just realized he's actually 22 but in my head he's still a teenager...whoops)

I use a fork tine to pre-poke the holes.

My cat does not mind his harness and leash at all, but he HATES going anywhere near the elevator, and we live on the 7th floor, so......

Nooooo! You have to spread the jelly first because jelly washes off of the knife with just water, whereas you must use soap to wash the knife after spreading peanut butter.

Or do what I did and learn to knit (kinda). Scarves for everybody!!!!

This chart is suspect because nowhere does it mention that you can make CAKE in a MUG in the MICROWAVE.

To kill bugs and bacteria that could hurt your plants.

I frequently scramble or poach eggs in the microwave and if you do it right they are not rubbery or smelly, and taste good. The key is to lower the power wayyyyy down.

Most of your food probably already has bug vapors in/on it.

My mom: "Oh, were you on Jeopardy? I didn't notice. I had to drive your brother to his first day of his fourth month of his second year of his first adult job! I'm so proud of him!"

If you like modern musicals, it's AWESOME. If you don't like musicals (or only like the classics) it's not going to change your mind, because it's kind of weird.

I will gladly eat all of these foods for you, so you don't have to. You're welcome.