Door across the hallway: "Dude! Are you OK?!"
Shot Door: [toughly] "Bro, I'm fine, I didn't even get my bell rung."

"In the future, nobody should try to shoot that door. That door is too tough."

I'd be very surprised if that's just her 12th man.

1. Aaron Rogers.

Pictured: Yet another Cam Newton turn over.

She's done more with her life than this patchy-haired grub-man, this toothy dishrag of a person, ever will.

British taxpayers paid this family of unqualified do-nothings $51 million in 2012-13.

APB? Yeah, you don't want a hispanic QB dropping back into shotgun with today's police force around.

Roger Goodell would like to take this opportunity to remind Bills fans that it rarely snows in London.

"If the NFL is pushing this game to be held, then shame on the NFL," Poloncarz said.

Apparently they're also doubling down on a commitment to play in League One next year.

Those teams are totally getting screwed and don't understand how time works.

Can we just go back to singing Take Me Out to the Ballgame?

-Stevie Wonder

Kolb recalls the precise moment he knew he was done

"My deepest apologies, but would you mind if I..."

This was me letting the FIOS guy in last month

I've seen substitutes go much further. Kirk Cousins actually fucked his team.

Crowder immediately gave the report an A