I don't move my lips when I read.

Thanks for stopping by Elin.

THIS! I hate the Tigers with a god damned passion (GO TRIBE!) but jesus.. Don't get pissed off at the fans hating you when you've blown goats all season.

I'm guessing understanding sarcasm isn't your strong suit.

Sal: Not to beat a dead horse, Ray, but what did your wi...

Make it Suntory time!

I wonder what flashed before his eyes

I still have no idea how he managed to give up 3 earned runs on the throw.

Warren Sapp blocked me because I replied to one of his "time to make the doughnuts" tweets with "you should stop eating them you fat pile of shit." So sensitive.

When asked about his opinion on Hamas, Emmitt Smith replied that it's too garlicky.

Just a personal preference, friend. Also, my exam was not lost in the ether and I slept fine between both days without freaking the fuck out wondering if my exam would count for anything, so, there's that.

I'd be sad, too. History, recent or otherwise, hasn't shown Washington to be very hospitable to Indians.

Patriots Screw Panthers, Create Super Panther That Patrols Mexican Border And Eviscerates All Undocumented Children

Know what they call an "unwritten rule?" Not a rule.

Actually, no. If you're dumb enough to be racist and have a 23-year old black mistress, make sure the bitch isn't recording your racist old ass.

I hope Ichi got the gift basket

Wow, I thought he only saw the world that way on the football field.

Who Really Runs New York Sports?

I think he is literally going to make the exact same argument he did on the show and not even realize it.

I watched the video on my phone while taking a shit, like a normal person. So portrait worked out well for me yet again