Do you ever wonder why you don't have any friends?

What if I told you that nobody really cares? That all of your deeply held beliefs and meticulously researched arguments could simply be ignored?

Those are some pretty highly respected sources there

Sean White is an ass, he doesn't deserve any medals.

"More puss for me."

Elton John: Don't worry, Michael, it gets bett-

Aww, I was hoping it was this.

Would you settle for this.

Just like the rest of this city you seep of white privilege. Amazing how you love the fact that so many black men brought you joy but you continue to do all that you can in making this the 5th Whitest city in America! The real bums are the crooked politicians and corporate bastards who line their pockets. Yes,…

There was still one thug on the parade route.

- Daddy, what do you do when you go to work?

C'mon, Beast, now Fox News will be calling you a thug!

Peyton manning don't dance he just pull up his pants and throw the ball away...pick six a pic six a pick six....

Aww kid. No tears. Just wait years from now when starter wife takes your $22 souvenir soup mug out of spite.

Fuck it. I'm starting to really like Justin Beiber. Blatant disregard for common decency? Utter contempt for his pre-teen fanbase? Pills and weed during a Lamborghini race on a busy freeway? Plowing Brazilian prostitutes? Playing basketball poorly? This kid is everything I would be if I had a billion dollars too.

[takes a shot]

That's just awful. An NBA court is no place for such a terrifying, doped-up looking Bird Man.

Parent: Awwww, it's so cute and cuddly. Look at that thing. Do you want to go see it, Billy? Yes you do, lets go!