"For the last time, it's not offensive. We don't find it offensive. Hell, sometimes we use it to refer to each other at home!"

Belichick: Aaron, is your life in danger?

"a very cool stunt that I'd like to have documented by a reputable news outlet."

You really think this is the easiest way to catch a 350-pound Marlin?

Nick Saban is a high functioning autistic. We can all agree on that, right? Both of those excerpts display autistic behaviors.

It all comes back to FUCKING TEBOW.

Geez, way to look out for your members, NFLPA. It's hard enough for your guys to think once.

Steven A Smith was briefly considered to help mediate, but yelling Atallah usually leads to more trouble.

The reactions from the other drafters is both funny and confusing, as I can't see why they wouldn't find the humor in this. It's just so patently ridiculous. I mean, it's inconceivable that anyone would be stupid enough to draft Tim Tebow in the first round of anything, right? That would NEVER happen. I mean, you'd…

"Ha! You call that ruining a mock draft?!"

Corporation for Public Broadcasting: [Wakes up in strange hotel room]
[Swoons]
[Notices blood seepage on sheets]
[Gags]
[Leans off side of bed; vomits in trash can]
[Becomes aware of nagging soreness in rear]
[Staggers to dresser]
[Stares into mirror above dresser]
[Massages facial bruises]
[Spits at reflection]
[Reels; vomits…

Employee: Hello, A-1 Landscaping, how can we help you?

I love that you can see the big-ass camera rig sticking out of the passenger's side as it approaches the ramp

Presented without comment

RG3, meet RG 3'n'out

Maybe Smith just wanted to see who he really was under there.

The new "Lawyerin' Joe"?

Deadspin Commenter: [awakens from three-day bender]

I guess spelling is, too.