MP4-12C

Only if it’s a boy. If it’s a girl, MP4-12C obviously.

WRX STI RA Spec-C

XR4Ti.

LOL. How old are you? Everyone knows that Reel to Reel is where it’s at.

Read this.

Omfg how much is Apple paying jalopnik to shill their products.

This is wrong.

“To put it more simply: Everything is digital now.” ...such a shame that the human ear is so recalcitrantly analog. We can only presume that Apple engineers are working tirelessly to eliminate that long standing deficiency.

But can it drive over pencils? My Elantra can drive over pencils. If I see a pencil in the road, I’m just like, “Hey, a pencil. No problem.” And it isn’t.

No it’s not an outrage.

The surgery was a great success until the patient died.

I only buy manual.

Yes, especially when the correct technical term is really “most humongously ginormous”

Why are we pretending it won’t end up being named Trump Bomber and be the greatest bomber ever. All the other bombers, look they’re great bombers, I love those bombers. But this is the next bomber and it will make those other bombers look like Tonka Toys.

This will be a tough challenge, citizen. On one robotic hand, people watched her streams because of the sex appeal she has, the main selling point of watching her streams, much like people enjoyed watching me get blown to pieces by small arms fire.

Seive, heck, it’s a whole kitchen utenselry in one, um, sheet. It grates the finest cheese. It’s a micro-spaghetti colander. Cover your fruit in it for lasting freshness. Don’t get me started on the wonderful garlic you can press through it. Pne side is scrubby for cleanup, the other smooth for cleaning delicate…

Ok well, that’s just like, your opinion, man.

Advertising is a fickle thing that runs on all sorts of Jedi mind tricks and subconscious inception-ing. Despite doing some really indefensible things, if your sub-conscience sees Chuck Sheen and thinks “Ohh a bad boy, he’s edgy, I like him!” then that might be brand positive. If your sub-conscience is saying “AIDS…

NOOOOOOOOOOOOO. Y U DO DIS, NICOL?