My college roommates play in MLS. They don't necessarily feel like they won, but progress of any sort is progress all the same. When they renegotiate in 2019/2020, I think we'll see the league come closer to bonafide status in this country. It would be great for the players if the CBA expired right after the next…

Coach: "Hey kid, do you want fight? Do you want be put in?"

Le Batard is not sure what a "flex zone" is, but he hopes it kills him.

With the absence of many Caucasians in the league, they really can't afford this kind of White-on-Whiteside violence.

Oh man, well there goes the Premier League title.

But, does he like apples?

Until I see it on Greg Howard, I cannot agree with this assertion.

Yup

Haha I got a little ranty there near the end. That's my bad.

But hey, now you know something!

Look, I get it: Comedy is easier to create by making fun of something rather than supporting it. I understand why you would want to write this post.

"Ok, Mr. Sandoval, welcome to the Garden of Eden. Do whatever you want, just don't eat an apple from the Tree of Life, cool?" - God

The real asshole here? The bar that charges $7.25 for a Sex on the Beach. What kind of acute number is that? If it doesn't end in ".00" or ".50", what's the point?

FIFA is to "tough-yet-fair decisions" as Josh Hamilton is to "not cocaine".

"+1 to the Dougster, makin' comments!"

These Bognor Regis fans are lucky they didn't play the Shacklesford Dahmers. Never throw hands with a Dahmer.

"Mob Mentality" is a frighteningly real concept.

but that the Norbit star begged off at the last minute

In fairness to Jay, if I had to watch my daughter get her ass eaten on national TV, I'd misremember some things too.

Wait, let me guess... she's going to tell us?