I believe Marvin misheard Johnny's promise to "drink him under the table".

Damnit, finally a real reason to not want to fight Pacquiao right now.

"Hoo-ahhh-ble." - Pacino

"Wait, it's not about Puffs?" - Speights

The block of my dreams is a 3 pound, perfectly aged gruyère.

I don't know what the big deal is- if you can get Russell Wilson for Joe Fauria, you take that trade in ANY league.

.

I don't live in Texas, but is it safe to assume everything is on fire?

I'm glad she fixed it, I've been saying slalom is crooked for years.

Whoa whoa, easy on the "Hard N" there, Billy.

"Budweiser, King of Beers? My dick may be miniscule but I BOW TO NO KING!"

24. Gelada

Good luck putting jeans on a kangaroo.

I can't believe one man would do this to another.

It's a direct quote from the video. Next question? I'm good at this.

Unsurprisingly, Portland players were ok with it. The ol' "We're getting crushed, let's just let the clock run out" act is waaaaaay too mainstream.

"Scrappy, high-IQ kid. Guy shows heart out there."

Rob Gronkowski—a man perpetually imbued with the spirit of a 1 a.m. flip cup match

*Reads about Two One True Champions*

And here I thought I Better Knew An Umpire. SHODDY RESEARCH, ERIK MALINOWSKI!