Ryan said, "we'll sign up for that every week, even if we have Joe Namath at quarterback."

This is the worst rankings Deadspin has ever published, and I eat cereal.

KG needs to be careful. Weed isn't legal in New York yet.

"What are you doing??? His eyes are open! Get him off that cart and back in the game." - Brady Hoke

Pretty solid cutback for someone with no shoes.

Just in time to score 75 touchdowns in the playoffs for the Patriots.

I hope they find the guy, because nobody deserves this to be said about them:

HeidiKlumAndSeal.jpg

Celebrate for the QB from Florida State

Clickbait! I came here expecting to see Kenny Britt beat the shit out of Goodell.

"Jealous of Kobe? Infatuated? Hell no. That's not me. I hate that guy. He's got a tiny dick. Look at his dick. Look at all those veins. And look at his balls too! His balls and his dick. Look at those. He's so dumb. Just look at those, I know I am! His dick is so dumb, sitting there all flaccid and presentable. So…

Shaun Smith sucks. One of Magic's sons is the Marketing Director for a massive charity, and the other is a reality tv personality. Specify, you fat, lazy, basically a no talent pussy.

As a non-dad, I'm currently fashioning my own makeshift chastity belt after reading this.

Damn, I didn't realize getting whipped with Nerds Rope could cause so many injuries.

Gratz spent the day and night in jail, before bonding out Monday morning. The Jaguars were off this weekend, but Gratz missed today's practice

If Cierre Wood was wearing a 100lb vest and covered in molasses, then yes, Gray would have been the speedier part of the tandem at ND. The guy is not fast at all.

Welp, there goes the playoff spot...

Oh man, no amount of milk will help him forget this.

It's like I've always said: The N word can be a harmful or innocent gesture depending on the ending.

I've been hearing rumors all week about this firing, but I just got the actual reason from a source I trust: Apparently he didn't know the human head weighs 8 pounds.