Hell of a sequence from human garbage.

If you're in prison without a Bumgarner, you better Panik.

"It's ending," he said. "I'm ending it. I'm winding it down. I'm toning it down. I'm trying to tone it down. It's going to be hard, but I'm trying to tone it down."

+1

Vine is great. The Deadspin staff spends a good chunk of every work day sharing and laughing at Vines, and earlier today I asked everyone to share their favorite Vine of all time with me. These are the responses I got.

What's more of a crime: The Spurs apathy, or that debacle of an over-the-head fingertip handshake after Sarver handed off the mic?

Managing a soccer team is like making out with ebola patients: You should see it coming when you shit the bed.

Ok, fine. I care now.

"NOW??? NOW is the time to look away? Christ have you seen us for the past 11 years?" - Cubs

Brazil is very strict about their societal rules. Sure, they let Obama visit for a game, but the Brazilians never allowed Bush.

Well yeah, the guy clearly thought the Lions were in the Pac-12. He's gotta go.

Who wrote this list in Drew's place? There's not a single all-caps word in here.

Wow, Willis is really lucky he's still in college. In the NFL, punching a non-football player is a 6-game suspension.

"Thank god." - The family Sprewell

Look, Pierre, I'm all for solidarity with the race of people your team has made into a mascot, but an attempted scalping? Too much, man.

This is despicable, revolting, and downright deplorable.

[Watching Eddie Murphy do his Stevie Wonder impression on SNL in the 80s and going on to make Beverly Hills Cop and Coming to America]

This is awesome. A total conspiracy by the LOC, but awesome.

"So I told the horse, 'Hey, don't you worry'," Gordon says, "'People really liked your show! They connected with you. Carrie is an emotional woman, just searching for a man in the complex narrative of New York City.' I think she really took to it. And so did Ferris Bueller."

It tastes the best with shitty cereal, that's for sure.