These translations make it sound like Diego is speaking in third person. Or, as Luis would call it, dessert.

The Television Show "Girls"

"What does it say in the unwritten rules about wearing full body armor to bat?" - Jonathan Lucroy

I'm glad this is a cause for celebration. The last time a Latino battle finished 2-0, the winner had to hide his uncle's SUV.

Bastardize a picture of a Native American, alter it in mockery, and then promote it for everyone to see? What are we, Dan Snyder?

These are some great portraits of the celebrations. But we really wanted to see the landscapes.

Well, you know what they say: if you give 1000 monkeys 1000 typewriters...

Is the child in the Snyder situation of Native American descent? That would render the others completely obsolete.

*Looks at list of United States defenders*

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Looks like Roy really got caught standing around with his dick in his h-... well, no, that's not true.

Yeah sure, Tom, post this story but totally ignore the time Gary Payton bet Cher $18 and a pair of birkenstocks that she couldn't make a free throw.

"Aw come on guys! Get out of here, you're ruining the mood! I NEVER get her to do this with me anymore." - Delaware

Like most things Cuban, I'm pretty sure this throw is illegal in the United States.

Yes, but are they ëlitë???

I mean, aren't we ALL in a constant losing battle to get Luis Suarez out of our nightmares?

Best possible strategy: At kickoff, have Cameron ask Ronaldo what product he uses in his hair. That should buy us 26-28 minutes.

Instructions unclear; going home with Chris Berman

Yeah, and what the hell is that guy going to do with a billion Zunes?