Yeah, um, nobody's saying that. That straw man argument looks good on you.

Aren't Wales and Scotland both part of the United Kingdom? The fact that one is part of EPL and one isn't probably has little to do with FA bylaws. Catalonia seceding would be more similar to what Scotland voted on last month. I think.

Come on Steve, all your other friends hold basketballs and baseball gloves while they watch sports. Hell, Jenny's fiance Marco even holds a soccer ball, which even I, the non-sports-watching woman, know is against the rules. Can't you put down your beer for one day?

Wait, I thought Yinzers chanting an opposing pitcher's name magically resulted in playoff wins.

"We felt him in spirit."

Why does Gary Danielson think Kevin Sumlin — the coach — was so helpless here? If only he had some way to influence what his players did on the field ... oh well.

The Humane Society advises against using choke chains.

Keith Olbermann Slaycrushes That NFL Pussy, Bro Do You Even Bench?

Can somebody send out the Bat-Signal to Go Fuck Yourself Guy?

Many women DON'T report a rape because their attacker is somebody they're close to, they don't want to relive the incident, they're ashamed it happened, and they want it to go away. It's a totally natural human response, and it's the response many victims of domestic abuse — like Janay Rice — have shown.

+ II

The NFL's domestic violence problem is that the league has consistently and thoroughly shown that it is incapable of appropriately addressing the issue. Show us where somebody is specifically arguing that NFL players are more prone to hit women than the rest of the country, and I will show you either a mouth-breather…

Over/under on 10 years before there's a Ray Rice statue outside M&T Bank Stadium.

Is this where we go for Tom Ley's bear videos now, or is that getting its own subsite?

Colts: [Reporter Position Downsized], Indianapolis Star

2. Do you like punching babies?

It's a four-hour drive from Cleveland to Cincinnati? That sounds AWFUL.

Don't forget having Joe Theismann change the pronunciation of his name to rhyme with a certain trophy.

"I was with you until ..."

Tanner, to be fair, that far smelled like kale and quinoa.