brb, immediately opening a beach bar in Hawaii called the WeeWee-HooHa Hut.

If I lived in Snorrslida I would klittra all the time.

I ALWAYS USE ALL CAPS

I have had it with this motherfucking lack of cameras on this motherfucking plane!

NO.

Whenever someone uses all caps I just assume they are wrong.

I feel like the Oreo gunk is byproduct more of cookie than filling, yes? At least that’s my Oreo gunk experience.

I don’t even know why they kept making regular-size Oreos once they figured out Double Stuf.

Don’t you be spreadin’ your lies. I watched Mr. & Mrs. Smith and I know that if I brandish many big big guns and start shooting up my house, Brad Pitt will barge in and eventually make out with me in the kitchen.

Every soccer mom in America is a Manchurian Candidate, waiting to be activated with a trigger-word like “terrorist” or “thug”. Mechanized Nancy Graces, automated in the defense of vague Americana; mussing the hair of cereal-swilling children, straightening the neckties of bread-winning fathers, and furtively nudging…

You’re being ridiculous; instead of chasing them away from it, just fire a few warning shots over their head, that will learn’em a lesson real good.

Don’t drag Betty into your pro-handgun shit.

Unless your are willing to spend from two to four hours a day practicing practical shooting technique, do not carry a firearm.

What a perfect and succinct way of summing up why this is so aggravating! Yes, exactly; America has some good and some bad, and we can dispute how much of each until we are blue in the face, but anyone claiming that America is astoundingly perfect OR astoundingly awful is engaging in some kind of exceptionalism.…

Absolutely agree. But calling America “garbage” just makes it special in the reverse way. We’re not the best at being the worst either.

“There is no country that I can think of where black people are treated poorly simply because they are black except for America. Are there racial problems in other countries? Sure. But it isn’t as bad as it is here, especially where I live in the south.”

Yes! I get so irritated when people talk about how much they HATE this country while simultaneously soaking in some pretty wonderful first world privileges. My mom grew up dirt poor in Peru, and was forced to cook and clean and care for her 8 brothers (no mom) and nothing else because that’s just what women do, and…

Yeah that point wasn’t lost on me either! We got a whole lot of shit to still work on and our history isn’t awesome but we’re also talking about a lot accomplished in a much shorter time period and we are still moving forward. Sometimes with a few backwards steps but still better than the places that don't even allow…

This is so ‘monkey see, monkey do’ but damn, I want an old American flag to frame and hang on my wall! I wonder if that flag has a special Olympics significance?

“Woo woo, America! You are still a garbage country but we appreciate you allowing us do some of the things we want to do.”