I don't know about teens, but that unfriending or ignoring requests part has caused a lot of tension and awkward conversations in my family. "Why won't you friend me on Facebook?" "Umm....it's just close friends." "So I'm not a friend? You don't love me?" People take Facebook very personally. Not friending them…

Hey Albert, can you please provide a shorter form recipe for those readers who hate inspired, beautiful, brilliant writing about food and need a lazy, uninspired list of ingredients so they can go on with their miserable Hot Pocket-eating lives?

As a migraine sufferer, the thing that makes me suspicious is people who claim Excedrin Migraine cured their migraines. Real migraines are not cured by Excedrin Migraine alone which, by the way, has the exact same ingredients as regular Excedrin. It might be a bad headache. But it is not a migraine.

I tried to make ragu and somehow ended up with my girlfriend Prego.

I had the flu two years ago. Actual flu, not a bad cold. Since then I assume ~98% of those who claim to have the flu are lying or don't know what the flu is.

This is the stupidest thing in the world. My parents, bless them, never put barriers in my way, whether I wanted to invite 13 of my besties over for the 13th birthday (an epic party we still talk about 25 years later) or if I ended up having a week-long sleepover at a friend's house because we got snowed in and…

The only thing more fun than a "Sleepunder" is an"Unmovie Night" where its actually daytime and instead of watching movies everybody has to help clean the garage.

First thought: doesn't the crane have some kind of evacuation kit that can be hooked on somewhere, then allow the operator to safely descend?

Well hello victim blaming. Didn't take long for you to come around.

Last Christmas, my family brought one of my mom's friends and her three children over to see the lights in my parents' neighborhood. They are struggling financially and she is a single mom of an 8 year old boy with severe MS, a 3 year old girl, and an infant daughter. We made one of those Santa videos for him that…

Like a Boss.

My favorite feature of the Gingerbread Estate is how all of the gingerbread women hold their purses tightly if you add a chocolate cookie to the set

I kind of want it...but not for branding steaks. I just want to wander around branding any- and everything I can possibly brand. Steaks, of course. But also: bell peppers. trees. walls. the sides of decorative gourds. the arms of enemies. my dog's haunches, in case he gets lost. etc.

I made an account just to comment on this post. I am aprofessional chef of 10 years living and working in Brooklyn. Six of those were spent cooking breakfast at restaurant called Egg. You totally nailed it Albert, love the column as always!

Correct. I will drink water before I drink milk-colored water.

Skim milk is delicious when it is served ice-cold in a glass

Cook scrambled eggs, place over nice crispy hash browns, liberally cover in Hunts brand ketchup. Best way to eat scrambled eggs.

As a person with Cerebral Palsy and scoliosis who uses a wheelchair at all times, this made me feel so happy. PWDs often feel like an invisible minority in the world. We talk about LGBTQ folks, gender identity and expression, feminism, racism and much more in society, but we hardly hear about people with…

Yes, I was surprised to learn that there are only two kinds of underwear for women, and they are "synthetic" and "pantalettes." My entire drawerful of underwear will be devastated when I tell them they don't exist.

She had a panic attack. For that, they operated on her and took her fetus away prematurely. This is a horror show.