When an actor can out mustache Tom Selleck he should automatically get an Oscar.

Bartlett was charged with carrying a concealed firearm.

Any tips for alternatives to Acrobat?

“I was scrutinized a lot of my life because so many people took photos of me sneezing (snorting coke), looked like I was crying (snorting coke).”

Steak-umm AND popcorn chicken?

I can’t wait until Gruden drafts then inexplicably trades him.

This puts a lot of pressure on tonight’s Cheez-It Bowl to really deliver the goods

Seems you’re forgetting Walk Hard, the best movie of the 21st century.

Will this finally be Ferrell’s, “Love Guru” and put his already moribund career deservedly out of its misery?

First step: cut a hole in a box.

Snuggie. Everybody loves them but no one wants to be seen buying one. 

Democrats shouldn’t give him shit. Let him shut down the government, then they should go on Fox news and explain that Trump promised Mexico would pay for the wall. That if Trump was truly a great deal maker, and fiscally conservative, then he would find a deal that is great for the citizens of this country. 

Who am I…

“A room full of people enjoy[ing] a hilarious comedian”

I certainly don’t think there’s any excuse for choking a pregnant woman. But someone had to step in and stop Mrs. Rivers already.

Waiting for the day when I never see an image of this rainbow snow cone tattooed rapist clown face again, the filthy piece of shit. All the punches forever.

Yeah, I hated TLJ, but I ditched Star Wars fandom years ago. My childhood memories growing up in the 70's loving the hell out of Swar Wars are just fine, but the recent spate of SW movies flat out suck ass.

Personally, I’ll take Cary Elwes any day.

Wow, this guy just can’t stop killing people. 

Pumpkin Fuhrer is an excellent one! May I borrow?

At this point, what I’m worried about is that he’ll be impeached, resign or stroke out from the amphetamines and I’m beginning to think we need him around through the midterms next year, where the backlash to him is clearly going to create enough of a wave election for us to retake the house. Last night, the…