If you came into this post and didn’t expect dicks, you’re probably gonna get fired from your job soon anyway.

the blackest things about #verysmartwedding, in no particular order

panama’s wife literally had an whole entire EXTRA squad of bridesmaids. never seen a wedding that had bridesmaids coming off the bench, tagging in and out.

we had three wardrobe changes — two of which were almost compromised by clothes that had to be…

That’s precisely what I was going to say! That was the first movie I ever saw Melissa McCarthy in, and she was very good in it. She has serious talent—I wish she was in more movies that deserved her.

It’s a crime that the Pork Belly isn’t a regular option. 

Bonus points for answering w/ the correct geological period of a t-rex.

The Late Cretaceous.

Whenever I have a problem, I throw an interception,

that offense is in a Bad Place right now

My man, if you stare down your receiver like that on the street, you’re going to get slapped with a goddamn restraining order.

True Story: My dad died at 53 watching this football team.

How many times in one’s life do you get a clean shot at an overhead suplex? TAKE THE SHOT!

It is over when your opponent concedes.

Set aside for a moment every last issue of public policy. Forget, if you can, the racist, misogynistic, classist, pro-war, anti-environment, pro-mythology, anti-science legacy of the Republican party. The sheer and simple fact that enacting the GOP agenda is so hugely dependent on disenfranchisement completely…

That is not a bug, it’s a THE feature.

I’m confused as to why Los Del Rio made the list (much less as the video pictured with the headline). You’re obviously forgetting Macarena (Extended version), Macarena (English language remix), and Macarena (Extended English language remix version). Clarification would be appreciated...

This is going to be one of those biopics where nobody looks like the actual figures they are playing.

Raw magnetism and masculine charisma?! Gross!!!

If you haven't seen it, you are literally incapable of imagining what it's like.

Are there many alternatives that don't involve making an actor walk around on his knees?