Falcon McFalconface will be traded at the deadline for Pigeon McPigeonface and Edwin Jackson.

If a tree is removed and no one was around to witness it, was it ever really there?

Sticking it to the Jets is more of a Sharks thing though.

I will eat the berry for lunch. 

OH MAN THIS REMINDS ME OF THIS ONE TIME IN COLLEGE WHERE WE WERE DOING FIREBALL SHOTS OUT OF PEOPLE’S POO-HOLES (ANUSES) AND SOME WISECRACK THOUGHT IT WOULD MAKE EVERYONE LMAO TO SET ONE ON FIRE. WHEN I SAW THAT GAPING MAW OF FIRE, TEQUILA, AND A SMALL DINGLEBERRY I THOUGHT “NO WAY BUT THIS IS COLLEGE AND THERE IS NO…

OMG JOLIE IS BACK!!!!

You will need a screwdriver, a pair of tweezers, a magnifying glass (optional), some salt (~1tbsp), and a bag of chicken feed, preferably corn-based.

This act sends two distinct messages.

Sequels are never as good.

The jerseys will be auctioned off after the weekend

STUMP BEEFKNOB was deemed appropriate, though

I actually like throw-back and one-off jerseys quite a bit, provided they look good. The camo jerseys and the flag hats do not.

The “deep state spear” is Newt’s biggest fear and the terror that keeps him up at night: A big ol’ gay liberal dong that thrusts deep into the ‘Murican dream and pumps it full of rainbows and compassion. Oh! And the dong is black, and thinks that women should be allowed to vote.

whatever. She still won the popular slope.

My car’s worth less than that.

The funniest line in this post was “Additional reporting by Tom Ley.”

Meanwhile, their baseball brethren across town look at their success, mutter ‘eh, too much work’, and roll over for ‘just 5 more minutes’ of sleep.

But would this team have beat the 95-96 Bulls? Obviously not.

He knows you’re supposed to cook them, right? I mean, unless you’re Smeagol.

Nashville couldn’t score on 4 power plays, including a 5 v 3. They have no excuses. The better team all series won. The only thing I don’t get is how Crosby got the Conn Smythe. Yeah he’s still Sid and he’s still amazing but he did miss some time and I think Malkin or Guentzel would have had a better case.