Hey, maybe if she didn't wanna get hit, she should have been born a man and then hit this guy even harder with her stronger, faster arms.

Obligatory

Silly Samer. The ski lift is right there practicing in the fifth picture.

Rollo would be more appropriate.

You Owned Limbs Once.

This is certainly better than Shannon Sharpe's impression of a football analyst

Only assholes try to talk at urinals, so yes, it is quite common

The shirt may be Pizza Hut's, but the drunken accosting of random fans in public bathrooms suggests that this guy would be perfect at Papa John's.

IIIIIIIIIIIIIT'S THE CIRRRRRRRCLE, THE CIRCLE OF LIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIFE!!

If Kutcher decides to frame that photo, it'll only be the second geriatric he's ever mounted.

Everyone else must just be stuck in traffic.

Sure assholes, make fun of him just because he's brave enough to pursue a dream. I for one admire this man's spunk.

These Aaron Hernandez jail letters are getting weird.

My answer is neither one.

Dear New Favorite Asshole: