“To sleep with a child, it’s a holy experience, a baptismal event, a sacred adventure.”

My sister and I have cheers-ed each other the last two years with “To health and fiscal excellence!”. 2018 and 2019 resulted in multiple hospitalizations and financial catastrophe. We did not say cheers this year.

Teachers need to stop trying to get creative with “activities” to teach slavery. They are almost universally bad ideas that usually just end up teaching a bunch of kids that acting superior to a few of your classmates is fun. There are tons of books out there that can help teach the significance of slavery and racism…

“The court has placed no weight or significance on the testimony of Chelsey Cardilli unless her testimony was corroborated by other credible testimony or by the exhibits,” Mills wrote. “The level of dysfunction in her relationship with her parents and in her life in general in March 2019 cannot be overstated. Rules,…

Or you could do what I do: Panic when you realize that your airline has reduced their personal item dimensions (again). Scramble and order the first 12$ bag that fits that is also on Prime. Hatefully stare at your expensive and uselessly small/oversized former travel bag. 

Or you could do what I do: Panic when you realize that your airline has reduced their personal item dimensions…

I also feel that this is a direct attack on the people of the state who refused to put him back in office. 

I curse the person who invented this to pop a hernia while pooping too hard.

Um. I think you COMPLETELY misread my comment because I did not say that at all. Please explain how you got that. What Mr. Ell did was a wrong and he could have killed Rygg. Ell committed a crime and will suffer the consequences. I would never advocated for violence, but I sympathize as I understand the gut reaction…

EW NO. 

This is so so sad. I completely sympathize with the father. I can only imagine the rage and horror he must feel knowing that his daughter was attacked and that the people who should have done something (anything!) did nothing. But, violence isn’t the answer. Not only did Clara have to live through the ordeal of an…

“Trump Refuses to Use Safe Word While Hog-Tied to Impeachment Sex Swing”

In a former lifetime I would have prayed this reached the Supreme Court... now I can’t believe in the courts ability to judge without bias.

“Mr. Nancy, among other characters, is not featured in the portion of the book we are focusing on within season three.” HORSESHIT. American Gods is a very good book, but Anansi Boys is amazing! No way Showtime doesn’t plan to tap into at some point.

This made me chortle at my desk. Thanks for this. 

The golden rule: Tip 20%*.

Callaway’s lawyer stated that he, “did not act with any criminal intentions” ... but you did, you knob! It’s clear as day that you groped and hit a stranger because you thought it would be SO FUNNY. Last time I checked assault was a criminal offense.

I have found the quality of L.L. Bean products has tanked significantly since they did away with the life-time guarantee.  

I have found the quality of L.L. Bean products has tanked significantly since they did away with the life-time…

There are problems the NHS faces that, as an American, I simply am not informed of. I’m not foolish enough to think it’s a perfect system, but the NHS saves lives and has done so for a LONG time. It really is an incredible system. 

The same reason people have been trying to put bronzer on me for years. It makes you “sunny” they said! It covers red spots they said! It brightens and conceals dark under eyes they said! NO, IT MAKES YOU LOOK LIKE A CROSS BETWEEN A GERIATRIC FLORIDIAN AND A HARUJUKU GIRL.

It makes me a brat, I know, but I LOVE snooping through anti-NHS articles as an American. Sure, no system is without criticism and constructive criticism is helpful to better healthcare but the small minority of brits that moan about the NHS simply don’t understand what they have. “Brit pulls his own tooth after…