Big deal: James Harden brings a cardboard cutout of himself to every Rockets game for when his team is on D.

If only there were a fitting disease to wish upon Joe Ricketts...

Yeah, weird that I ascribed white nonsense to white people.

“The school mascots are selected by their honor and basically pride that it brings the school,” Shirk said. “If I was a Native American—I feel there was no disrespect intended. It was done to be a unique and fun poster.”

Unbelievable - a 9/11 conspiracy theory.

Deleting the post about noted floor-shitter Chuck Johnson shitting on the floor doesn’t mean that Chuck Johnson is no longer a floor-shitter.

Upon hearing of Miller’s assault on a septuagenarian, a saddened Emmitt Smith stressed the need to respect all religions.

PICTURED: Mike Tyson Baskin’ after alleged Robbin’.

ARRESTING OFFICER: Names?

Just for clarification, Bernard Tomic is Australian and “I’ll put my balls in your mouth” is Aussie slang for “I’ll put my testicles in your mouth.”

Ah, the ol’ seventh-inning stretch.

“Nah, we’re good.”

Who?

“You know I’m the new O.J.”

In a case like Dywane and the Heat’s relationship going sour, it’s always important to ask ywh.

“But Triple H was watching my back, and he beat the snot out of that guy.”

He might not get traded.

He’s already demanded a trade to the Pirates.

The Leafs’ history of making shitty draft decisions is well-documented, but here’s a more recent dumb move:

He’s reportedly signed a five-year extension with an AAV of $5.5M as per McKenzie and Mirtle.