When you publicly make a lifelong commitment and break it 9 months later people are bound to treat you differently. Why does that surprise you?

I think it is when you write a blog post on divorce and never give any background

"I'm just a simple unfrozen caveman, your modern "psychology" is confusing and scary to me."

But if these guys could get it on the reg, maybe they don't tag-team some poor girl in front of each other...

You have to realize that rape isn't about whether or not a guy can get laid easily, right?

It figures that the Six Winter Springs High football team runs a no-option spread.

"These woods over here?"

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Lucky for Newton his Twitter is only gone for two days on account of being provoked.

I don't understand all this talk about throwing people under the bus. If you've ever seen RG3 play, you know he'd bounce them about 10 feet in front of the bus.

That list is better than Marchman's cereal list. Sign her up for a full time spot.

You sure corrected the shit out of that joke.

I'd suggest he talk to the Chicago Bears next, but he doesn't seem like the guy to deliver the message that they need to stop talking and just do their jobs.

'so they tell me you killed that camel jockey' - Dan Snyder

#66 on the Panthers O-Line got schooled worse than every UNC athlete for the last 15 years.

Remember, just because you ordered the Gratuity, it doesn't mean you owe your date anything!

I sort of feel torn about the "weirdest Italian food" customer. On the one hand, what a dummy, amirite? On the other hand, I feel like since he really enjoyed the meal and is just seemingly harmlessly ignorant, I don't want to be snarky. Like, he wasn't being racist or anything, just all "this is weird Italian…

Regarding secret shoppers: Editor's Note: There is no screening process. Any idiot can — and usually does — sign up for that job

When I was in Europe, selling monogrammed thermoses, THEY would cook my steaks for me until it was tender, no matter how long it took. Americans are so lazy sometimes.