Arizona decides which running back to use by cutting Cards.

"Paper!"

Make it arraign!

Will there be yogurt? I'm not on board until there's yogurt.

Dude, I appreciate where you're coming from, but if Jezebel taught you sex-positive feminism, then there is a lot of stuff you need to read.

I hate caps, but today I will do it.
LEAVE MILEY ALONE.

So much for our national right to peacefully assemble, I guess no one here's heard of the First Amendment.

Joe Flacco's priorities on the day his second child is born:

You really have to watch the bias creep, because this post is really insulting to disturbed children who mutilated their Barbies.

In my state the age of consent is "sort of" 16; as I understand it the older partner must within 4 years (upwards) of the 16 year old. So 19 is okay. 21 is not. However, a couple states over, an 18 year old and someone about to turn 17 aren't supposed to be having sexual contact. This shit needs to be codified…

If anything, Sarah Michelle Gellar being a part of Gucci's sex life is a more stunning revelation.

Finally a Ken doll wielding something worth mentioning.

Ned: "Who's up for a big bowl of nonfat ice milk?"
Todd: "I want wintergreen!"
Maude: "Unflavored for me."

You know the public values Greggg segments more than we do your mental health.

I know I should be grateful that the Jamboroo is back (and I am!) but getting rid of Greggggggggggg and keeping Great Moments In Poop History is like making oatmeal raisin cookies instead of oatmeal chocolate chip, or The Beatles reuniting but playing Wings songs instead of Sgt. Pepper, or having a Russian literature…

Can't wait to read why each one deserves a C+.

I don't understand Maryland's decision here. The Terps were perfectly compliant by turning game balls over to the opposite team.