This story has gone viral, and I approve. Expose the frauds. Run them out of town.

$10 for a bar of chocolate?

The lesson here kids is: “if you’re gonna get caught, get caught after you’ve successfully launched.” Or you know, don’t get caught. Or better yet, don’t cheat.

Yeah, I’m disappointed. I love her and I really wanted to like the line, but it just looks like all the same stuff I refused to buy at Lane Bryant.

My friend is a chocolatier and has been ranting about how nasty Mast Brothers is for years. Now that this has come out she feels so vindicated.

“Each Mast Brothers bar had a flat, roasty, anodyne flavor typical of industrial manufacturers using bulk cacao from western Africa,” he wrote. “More suspiciously, the texture was as smooth and slick as store-bought couverture from a multinational behemoth, which is unimaginable from a small maker using tabletop…

The best part of their chocolate is the wrapping. I’m a sucker for well-presented foods, especially sweets and I definitely bought a few bars of Mast Brothers back in the day solely for the wrapping. I think I ate a third of one of the bars and threw the rest of it away because it was gross.

Maybe smug is the secret ingredient that gives Mast Bro’s chocolate it's distinctive assy flavor.

America’s chocolate game is WEAK. So weak.

“We love making chocolate, and we have the audacity to think that we are pretty good at it too.”

One thing I just cannot abide is lying about chocolate.

And he calls himself

Let’s take a moment to look at the stunning beauty that is Jeffrey Wells...

This.

Ok Kylie. Let’s talk.

I’m surprised no one tried to tack on an amendment banning funding for Planned Parenthood, or banning all Muslims, or something stupid like that.

This was what I got for Christmas in 1977. It’s a kodak instamatic. The long blue thingie on the left is tower of flashbulbs that you snapped onto the top of the camera vertically. The wrapped tampon-looking thingie in the back is 110 film. I think the whole thing together cost maybe 20 bucks.