They brought it back!!! You can get vintage Fisher Price toys at Target. We got this for my two year old and he loves it, which is hilarious because he’ll never know what a rotary phone actually is.

this was my shit

OMG I remember this. This was their vow renewal or something! I remember Entertainment Tonight covering this in breathless detail. She was brought in to the room carried on a platform held up by shirtless “slave boys” or something. There were tigers there, maybe? It was some sort of weird mishmash of tacky/racist…

The title of the catfisher’s book just made me beak out in Sister Hives.

He’s been stealing from rich people. That’s a Serious Crime. (As opposed to stealing from anybody else, which is frowned upon because it takes time away from the judge’s golf game.)

I thought the fact that Kylie Jenner has “fans” was ridiculous, but that this ass-face has fans is a whole other level of bizarre.

He’ll prob be fined in the millions and forced to go through a sensitivity training course that’s 6-11 hours.

This really is the plot arc to so many Christmas movies. It’s like this guy’s heroes are Gordan Gecko and Ebenezar Scrooge. I hope he’s ready to be visited by the ghost of security futures.

Dude stole from older, richer, whiter guys. It’s like the only thing a guy in his position could do that will land him in serious shit. Allegedly.

I read somewhere that there’s a clause in the contract for the sale of Once Upon a Time in Shaolin. Apparently either alone, or abetted by Bill Murray, Wu-Tang is allowed to attempt to “heist” the album and if successful, retain it. Without any legal repercussions.

What do we (or Jez legal types) think the odds are of him actually serving time for this and/or losing significant assets? I don’t have tons of faith in the system right now (or ever).

I saw this news alert on my phone this morning and laughed and laughed and laughed. Best Hanukkah gift ever.

The fact that he has fans baffles me more.

My first question was, HE HAS FANS?? WTF.

Couldn’t happen to a nicer guy!

So punchable.

All together now!!!:

KARMA

Christmas came early! Remember friends, every time a Martin Shkreli is arrested an angel gets its wings...an AIDS patient gets their meds...overpriced musical memorabilia isn’t sold to a douchebag.

I’m skeptical. Do these really taste good, or is this what vegans tell themselves in order to keep the faith? Honest question. Not rhetorical.