I feel really sorry for these girls, but there is a silver lining—they don't have any of his DNA. When they're older and they find out what their father really was, they can comfort themselves with the thought that they're not really related to him after all.

I get a really hinky vibe from him. I feel like I should think he's good looking, but somehow he just looks smarmy and arrogant. Also he has the acting ability of a potted plant. I may be biased because he was in one of the worst movies I've ever seen. I'm not very forgiving that way.

I can't even find the words to say how ridiculous this is. What would make someone "unfit" to have an abortion? This is just a weak excuse to be judgmental about the morality of young women. (Who are already judged guilty because they obviously had sex and we can't have that, now, can we?). I wonder how many people…

I don't have the dollhouse any more, but I found the barn at a thrift store (the old one, not the newer one with the stupid fat animals). The barn still moos! I think I have a dog somewhere, too. I wish I still had the little car. I should look around my mom's house. It's probably still there somewhere.

All I had when I was a kid was an old-school Fisher Price dollhouse. No fancy-schmancy wooden dollhouses with lots of furniture for me! It didn't have a bathroom, so the poor dolls had to use the "outhouse" under the stairs. I don't know what they did when they needed a bath. But it was the best dollhouse ever,…

I would go there if someone paid me to write about it.

I live for Sandwich Mondays! I think we need to send them on an around-the-world tour, eating sandwiches all the way.

Huh. I was unaware that Jeopardy is now a half-hour long infomercial. I wonder how much they got paid for promoting all of these products.

I'm feeling good right now that I've never seen any Nicholas Sparks movies. Everyone was raving about The Notebook when the book came out. I tried to read it, but the writing was so horribly bad I only made it through a few (short) chapters. I ended up giving it away, and after that I didn't feel it was worth…

I had some skeezy relatives who tried to lure me away from reunions and other family events. Gross.

I would marry a man who brought me pie. I would marry him twice if he baked the pie himself. Piemen are sexy.

Yep.

He's all ready for Halloween. His costume: The world's smallest baked potato!

Now that's how you do a penis sheath!

I am really glad no one is in this room right now, because I just had the weirdest facial expression. I don't believe I've ever had that kind of reaction to anything. Then I unscrunched my face and busted out laughing.

It seems to be a windsock for the penis. Maybe it's for when you don't have a pole to hang a regular windsock from; you can take this anywhere and tell which way the wind's blowing.

Cibrian is reportedly CHEATING on Rhimes

And then they tell you you're not being "proactive" because you didn't do what they wanted you to when they didn't even know what they wanted you to do.

Isn't work fun?! It's not like it would kill anyone to show a little appreciation when you bust your butt to do a good job on something. And they wonder why morale is low!

Do they actually use the paddles? It would suck if you spent that much time decorating a paddle and then someone whacked you with it.