We call Speed Bumps ‘Sleeping Policemen’ in the U.K. too. . .

Basic Christmas etiquette: If you are in the kitchen you are either helping or leaving. The only exception is if you are there to fill up my Mum’s Sherry glass. Once done you should immediately revert to one of the other states.

Die Hard is the only Christmas movie you ever need.

Good Article, Great Kinja Comments!

When your current dog dies can I replace it? Your dog is better medicated than all mt family crazies. I’ll even wear the special Christmas Sweater...

Thanks Yannick, now I know what I will doing instead of my work tomorrow morning (Australia time)!

It is a very common mistake because we pause naturally when we use a conjunction in speech and people place commas where they would pause while speaking.

And less ridiculous than Quidditch (by a hair).

Its a bit niche though isn’t it?

I really wish you had finished that simile. Just to see what you came up with. Or was the ellipses the simile?

It just seems kind of crazy to me, because you get paid to write.

* Law-enforcement officers are typically exempted from this policy, although I struggle to understand the argument that members of the Army National Guard count as “law-enforcement officers.”

Even that got the nerf-bat of shame a few patches ago though!

Groomsmen are there for that sort of dirty work...

This is what groomsmen are for. To put bitches like this down in their seat and keep them there.

I don’t have a spotify for this, but I just listen to The Echelon Effect.

I don’t think you know what you are encouraging. Fanfic always goes in the most NSFW direction conceivable. I seem to remember a disturbing Elrond/Picard slash-fic that I was putting effort into repressing...

I have a question and you sound like you know your shit.

I wouldn’t know a Hymen if it was looking me straight in the eye...

Damnit, I forgot the first rule of internet. Always be a jerk. I should have swore more.