Groomsmen are there for that sort of dirty work...

This is what groomsmen are for. To put bitches like this down in their seat and keep them there.

I don’t have a spotify for this, but I just listen to The Echelon Effect.

I don’t think you know what you are encouraging. Fanfic always goes in the most NSFW direction conceivable. I seem to remember a disturbing Elrond/Picard slash-fic that I was putting effort into repressing...

I have a question and you sound like you know your shit.

I wouldn’t know a Hymen if it was looking me straight in the eye...

Damnit, I forgot the first rule of internet. Always be a jerk. I should have swore more.

No. I’m not calling you a sociopath at all. In fact I wasn’t attacking you at all. I was suggesting that sometimes is it hard to empathise with things far from ones normal experiences. So I offered a non-patronising alternative that many grown ups can relate to. Which you didn’t even acknowledge.

Lets get Oprah involved...

I’m guessing from your lack of empathy that you don’t have a job that requires you to spend long periods of time talking.

Ahh the old Zero Sum problem. Devs aren’t losing out if Voice Actors get a decent gig.

Except for Rothko paintings.

So, after removing the ‘just darling’ center piece?

I got you, bro.

Remember to keep your hands open when you offer them food too. Wouldn’t want to lose a finger...

Did you also buy a step ladder so you can get into bed at night?

I love raw chicken. It is super good for you.

Are you not planning on addressing the fact that this person thinks sugar and antibiotics are toxic?

SUGAR IS NOT TOXIC.

You think someone isn’t making profit just because what you eat grew on a fucking tree?