Hey fellas what's going on he-

Well that's a plain old silly comment. Deadspin is staffed by writers, not painters.

Those last 14 paragraphs really snuck up on me.

It should go without saying that if someone is too intoxicated to remember an event, they're also too intoxicated to consent.

"DNA found in her hair, on her tank-top, and on an anal swab matched that of Lueke's, despite the fact that he'd said there was no physical contact between him and the victim. After his arrest, he changed his story, telling police they'd had consensual sex."

No. The worst thing DOPS does is suspend to the outcome, not the action.

What a spin doctor...

160 years ago he would be telling you that his slaves get a roof over their heads, free meals, the dignity of hard work, and that it's a pretty good deal for them.

Personally, when I have no interest on an article I decide not to click on it. But if I do click on it and read it and still have no interest I definitely don't comment about how I clicked on an article which I didn't like from the beginning and still didn't like it after opening said article.

Furhan Furhan

Roosevelt should have seen this coming when the Secret Service changed his codename to Watership.

I ran a 5k once, and I got a time of 29.39

Assuming I kept that pace for 26.2 miles, I would have run it in 4 hours and 37 minutes.

Total false flag operation. Taft hangs back at just the right moment. He clearly knew what was coming. The President's race used to mean something. Now it is just a joke.

Jesus, he's lucky they didn't crucify him for this.

the "play the right way" generation is trying to smother it in the crib.

I don't think anyone has ever written this much about Craig Ferguson, ever.

Oh fuck you. Fuck you. Just. Just fuck you.

COACH JR SMITH, DO THE RIGHT THING PHIL

Jerry Rice: But this roof is made of glass! We'll be cut to ribbons!

no