@powermatic: That dude's man card is revoked.

Lovingly referred to as "The Space Ship" by my date, my parents' 1994 Chevy Lumina was where all the magic happened. And by magic, I mean we went out to eat and held hands. Legit.

@Spiegel, Jamaican bobsledder: Deal.

@Spiegel, Jamaican bobsledder: The Ford Durango and Dodge Durango (pre-2004) disagree.

I think PETA would shit a brick if there was car painted in this skin today.

"Powerchip, Australian for Cunts."

The Chinese also think Pabst Blue Ribbon is a luxury beer. It costs $44/bottle. I can't tell if the Chinese are merely being ironic or really like it.

@OMGItsWeasel: Last week I was home from work sick and my mom brought me a spicy chicken sandwich, waffle fries and an oreo shake. BTW, I'm in my late 20's and married.

I'd rather be shot in the back 4 times than drive this thing...

Here's my fail-proof plan:

From the OC Register article:

@87CE 95PV Type Я says you can wish me Merry Christmas: I love it.

Terrible Pun Alert: He must've been Russian home to beat the traffic. I kid, I kid...

Russia, you're doing it right.

In related news, I spent over $80k in tuition for 4 years at a private university. I could have bought many Chevy Cruzes at that point, but I did learn how to spell the word "Cruise" correctly, so I think I came out ahead.

$225k! That's like 2 Teslas! Wait...um...

@Justin Hyde: My response.

@Yosemite Spieg: If I were truly fishing for a star, I would just try to rip your commenting style, guaranteeing me some COTDs and subsequently, star power. Maybe something along the lines of:

I think I speak for everyone (and by everyone, I mean me) when I say that no one fucking cares. I have no personal information on my Gawker profile, no credit card account information, no social security information; nothing. They could hack my account everyday and at worst it would be an inconvenience.

@nosirrahg: To be fair, Tulsa kept that car underground.